Wednesday, March 28, 2012

My Heart, My Dream

I am the oldest of four kids, and I am the only girl. Growing up, pretty much everyone thought that my parents were crazy for having four kids. We got lots of stares from strangers everywhere we went. People often commented on how my parents "have your hands full". Yes, it's true, mom and dad definitely had very full hands. We learned at a fairly early age that there were some things in life that we couldn't afford to do, like those dreamy and super expensive vacations to Disney World (although mom and dad did take me when I was about 3.. that was when there were only 2 of us and my brother stayed with my grandparents because he was too young to come). We learned that the reason for this was because there were four kids and not one or two. (I'm not trying to knock anyone who grew up in a family of one, two or three kids, or who got to go on those magical vacations and such. It just wasn't something that we could do and I'm cool with that) The best thing is though, that my mom and dad made it obvious that even through they didn't have the nicest clothes or cars, or the newest gadget on the planet, they didn't mind, they didn't care. My mom and dad made is so crystal clear that they loved us more than anything the world could offer. Sure, they wanted nice things for us and themselves but it wasn't consuming, it wasn't their lifestyle to be absorbed into materialism.

I saw this article, Motherhood Is Calling, and it really struck me because I know what it is like to be the kid who hears all the comments people make about someone having their hands full with a gaggle of kids. I didn't think much about it then, but looking back I realize how difficult that must have been at times. My parents didn't care what the world thought and would have given their lives for us if had been needed. They still would. My parents stood between us as kids and the world- they protected us and modled Jesus for us and the world to see. I can't thank them enough. 

As a result of this, I discovered a long time ago that my heart's desire is to be a mom. (and before you ask, no, I'm not pregnant.) I know that this will happen in the Lord's timing and that until then, He's got valuable lessons to teach me. I look forward to the day I am a mom. I want to be like my mom, my grandmothers, my mother-in-law and my husband's grandmothers. I want to be the kind of mom who models Jesus to her children and the world. This is my heart, this is my dream. 

{From left to right: Brother 1, Mom, Me, Dad, Brother 2, Brother 3}


  1. Just saying, in your wedding picture, your dress is perfectly fluffed :)

  2. Why, yes it is! I wonder which wonderful person fluffed it so perfectly????? ;)